You feel humbled and so you embrace these moments of need in high regard -- Meanwhile you embody Oprah Winfrey.
You feel entitled and notable because your friend was drawn to you in times of struggle for a life lesson or two. So naturally, you feel you must be doing something right... right?
Well, no.
We absolutely love giving others advice that we fail to implement on our own lives. Hypocrisy at it's finest, some might argue. The satisfaction is in full until it is us in need of guidance and so we go to another friend that we feel has their shit together, and the trifecta continues.
Here's what they would say (and not apply):
1. Stop saying you could care less, when in reality you couldn't care more.
There is a certain proud inclination amongst the young folk of this generation to follow a sort of societal (and lyrical) protocol insisting that we care and feel less. Now that I am a little older and perhaps wiser, I can honestly say that most of the time I have said "I don't give a shit" or anything along those lines, chances are I was either just embodying some catchy rap song or my pride dug in too deep to admit that I genuinely did care a great deal.
Now a' days it seems as though thoroughly caring about someone or something is considered weakness or a form of devaluing yourself, when in fact, we all see right through your facade and the only thing you're actually "devaluing" is your authenticity.
Be natural. Whether it feels wrong or right, follow your own intuition. There is no shame in concerning yourself with others, no matter the degree. Allow yourself to feel anything and everything. I mean, really, what do you have to lose? Besides your dignity... only kidding! No, but really, worst case scenario of texting that asshole is that he/she doesn't text you back. In which case, you validate to yourself for the 5th or 6th time (you've probably lost count by now), that he/she is indeed an asshole, and move the fuck on.
I'm serious.
2. Don't regret -
Because everything you did, at one point or another, was exactly what you wanted. Even if it didn't turn out to be the most beneficial decision, take it as life's many experiences that will (hopefully) instill some wisdom to know and do better.
Just try not to dramatize or sit in your pajamas all weekend with an oversized bag of Garden Salsa Sun Chips and a carton of Pistachio ice-cream, analyzing the crap out of it til' you decide it's time to finally sleep.
This is what life is about. Make mistakes, be an idiot, date an asshole, but realize that these mistakes sometimes come with moderately light to heavy baggage - And baggage usually means, being pissed on. Maybe sometimes literally (Refer to: Girl Peeing on Unconscious Man).
Because everything you did, at one point or another, was exactly what you wanted. Even if it didn't turn out to be the most beneficial decision, take it as life's many experiences that will (hopefully) instill some wisdom to know and do better.
Just try not to dramatize or sit in your pajamas all weekend with an oversized bag of Garden Salsa Sun Chips and a carton of Pistachio ice-cream, analyzing the crap out of it til' you decide it's time to finally sleep.
This is what life is about. Make mistakes, be an idiot, date an asshole, but realize that these mistakes sometimes come with moderately light to heavy baggage - And baggage usually means, being pissed on. Maybe sometimes literally (Refer to: Girl Peeing on Unconscious Man).
3. Stop dwelling.
Sometimes we find ourselves exhausting the "coulda, woulda, shoulda" - A habit that can leave us stagnant in just always feeling like we could have done something differently to change whatever it is we wanted the outcome to be, aka control freak.
Sometimes we find ourselves exhausting the "coulda, woulda, shoulda" - A habit that can leave us stagnant in just always feeling like we could have done something differently to change whatever it is we wanted the outcome to be, aka control freak.
Here are my two cents though: if you coulda, woulda, shoulda and you didn't, then there's your answer; as simple as it gets.
There was obviously something impeding you, making you re-consider to coulda, woulda, shoulda approach whatever it was that was conflicting you to freely make a decision in the first place. If you have to think about it too much, chances are it might not something you want to be exploiting in anyway.
There was obviously something impeding you, making you re-consider to coulda, woulda, shoulda approach whatever it was that was conflicting you to freely make a decision in the first place. If you have to think about it too much, chances are it might not something you want to be exploiting in anyway.
4. Be bold & be yourself.
As corny and cliche as this may sound, it is still no surprise at how often we avoid it.
Conventionally, it seems as though it is a "safer" approach to dim yourself down when meeting people for the first time. Mostly because you don't want them to think you're a nut right off the bat and then completely discard of you without realizing you're at least 75% sane. So guilty.
But you know what I've realized? Not only do you repress who you are initially, but you never end up building the courage to fully commit to being who it is you truly are because of the predisposed notion that you'll be exiled immediately.
If you're messed up in the head or consistently having weird and random thoughts, let that shit out. Talk about it, sing about it, or write about it.. *chuckles*. You'd be pleasantly surprised at how many people you'll find that are as twisted in the head as you. Or, if you're a huge Star Wars fan or are really into Dragon Ball Z or Pokemon - I mean, do you realize how engagingly sexy that is? It also means you're a freaking human with actual interests and cue in, con-ver-sa-tion.
This is an epidemic!
Now excuse me, while I completely disregard everything I just wrote.
As corny and cliche as this may sound, it is still no surprise at how often we avoid it.
Conventionally, it seems as though it is a "safer" approach to dim yourself down when meeting people for the first time. Mostly because you don't want them to think you're a nut right off the bat and then completely discard of you without realizing you're at least 75% sane. So guilty.
But you know what I've realized? Not only do you repress who you are initially, but you never end up building the courage to fully commit to being who it is you truly are because of the predisposed notion that you'll be exiled immediately.
If you're messed up in the head or consistently having weird and random thoughts, let that shit out. Talk about it, sing about it, or write about it.. *chuckles*. You'd be pleasantly surprised at how many people you'll find that are as twisted in the head as you. Or, if you're a huge Star Wars fan or are really into Dragon Ball Z or Pokemon - I mean, do you realize how engagingly sexy that is? It also means you're a freaking human with actual interests and cue in, con-ver-sa-tion.
This is an epidemic!
Now excuse me, while I completely disregard everything I just wrote.
-signed, S
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